Even though I don't leave the house (quarantine, mostly), I'm constantly reminded of how ugly I am.
The two most recent incidents; first, a guy I had been talking to for a couple of months. We talked pretty much everyday, about everyday stuff, things in common, etc. I thought we got along pretty well. He would, most of the time, initiate the conversation. This all changed however, when we exchanged pictures. He didn't flat out ghost me, but pretty much. We barely talk now, and when I try to begin a conversation, it feels forced.
The second one, it was a guy I had only talked to for a couple of days, but it hurt the most. I don't know why I sent a pic so soon (this had never happened before [me sending a pic so early into the conversation, I usually wait months before I do it]), maybe it was because I genuinely enjoyed talking to him. He stopped talking to me a couple of days afterwards though. He attributed it to his social anxiety, but I think it was just an excuse and he was just being nice.
Neither of the conversations I had with them were ever remotely romantic. So why stop talking to me over my looks? I mean, what else would it be - one day, we're talking fine, then the next they see me, and suddenly they're not so interested in chatting anymore?
I'm sad, and alone. I just wanted to talk to someone. Guess I now know better next time I try to befriend someone (especially if it's a man) but I don't think I'll bother anymore.
I'm sorry for rambling. I guess I just wanted to put my thoughts somewhere, writing down this stuff helps too.